Angel heart, I start to miss you.
You used to be so light and free.
You walked among trees
and lived on a hill.
You abided by the Law,
the one you discovered
a long time ago in the summer.
There was the girl,
the one with whom you glided along
In the Laurentian air holding hands.
You saw a future in each other’s eyes,
one in which you took the
Path to Enlightenment together.
The world was easy to comprehend:
Famine Disease Misfortune,
there was a reason baked into the horror.
All the while you laughed and made love
and made light of everything.
everyone was a brother.
You walked on air
until the winds shifted
and the snarling face of reality pushed
a hand thru to rip out
the person you had become.
You parted with the girl
with not as much as a kiss goodbye.
And then another you emerged, a darker you,
a heavier you, more cumbersome and questioning.
The world ceased to make sense.
From then it was drinks and drugs and prolonged
There was no going back, it seemed.
I can’t situate myself to absorb you again,
to bring you back to me,
to see thru your eyes.
but innocence is not available.
I am hungry and in pieces
but I remember.